Saturday, December 31, 2011

Stats

We watched MSU win the Music City Bowl last night from the comfort of our own sofa. This got me thinking about last year at this time. We went to the Gator Bowl in Jacksonville, Florida and had a blast.


Like the matching shirts? Kinda cheesy, huh? We all wore long sleeves to the game and had to change into our t-shirts because it was so hot.

This year we missed the starting line up and kick off because of the end of another game. I love to hear the player stats in the beginning because it makes me realize that men and women are alike in some ways...we all want to be different than we are.

For example: a basketball player...they all list their height as taller; a line backer...weight heavier; any woman's driver's license...weight lighter.

Now I feel the need to insert a confession of my own: I am not 5'-4" like my DL says I am. I am actually 5'-2". I've never been 5"-4". I got measured with my shoes on one time and kept using that height. Whew...I feel better!

With stats in mind for our upcoming doctor's visit, here is a list of issues babies with Trisomy 18 sometimes have. I will put a star next to the issues we suspect or know that Battley had at our last ultrasound:
*kidney malformations
*structural heart defects
intestines protruding outside the body
**esophageal artresia
mental retardation

developmental delays
**growth deficiency
feeding difficulties
breathing difficulties
arthrogryposis
(a muscle disorder that causes multiple joint contractures at birth)
small head accompanied by a prominent back portion of the head
low-set, malformed ears
abnormally small jaw
cleft lip/cleft palette
upturned nose

narrow eyelid folds
widely spaced eyes
drooping of the upper eyelids
a short breast bone
**clenched hands
**choroid plexus cysts
underdeveloped thumbs and or nails
absent radius, webbing of the second and third toes
clubfoot or rocker bottom feet

**mother can have excess amniotic fluid

Some of those can be life threatening and some we just plain ole don't care about. Some days I just pick one of these things off the list and pray specifically for God to heal her of.

Today is a beautiful day. I have some work in my storage unit to get done...woo-hoo!

C

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Little Kicks

One of Catherine's favorite Seinfeld episodes is the one with the Little Kicks.



According to Catherine this is exactly how I dance.  Very funny...

Because we anticipate every movement Battley makes I'm constantly holding my finger tips on Catherine's baby bump to feel for a little kick.  One thing I've prayed specifically for is that Battley will grow stronger.  On Christmas we were at Catherine's parents house for dinner.  While we were there I felt Battley kick harder and stronger than ever before.  I could feel her foot for the first time!  This was not just a flutter I could feel against my finger tips.  We are anxious for the next ultrasound to see how much she has grown.

Mac is not allowed on the sofa.  Yeah right...


Adam

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Chapstick and Shopping Carts

What is your favorite store?  Mine is Target.  

Since I live in a house with a husband, a teenage son, and two male dogs I sometimes need to take a break from all the testosterone.  Target is my hang out for such times.  

Don't get me wrong...I don't mind that our garage constantly smells like sweaty socks and dirty cleats 
OR that our TV only seems to get ESPN and the History channel (they do watch Project Runway with me though the few times a year it comes on with minimal ugly comments)
OR that I sometimes catch them eating like cave men
it's just that sometimes I need a break from the MAN stuff.

It was on one such outing a few weeks ago that I was browsing the office supply aisle at Tar-jay when this happened:

I looked down the aisle to see a lady pass with her cart and about 5 steps behind her came a little girl (maybe 4 or 5 years old) with a baby stroller.  What was in the baby stroller?  Her Gogurt of course!  She had it strapped right in, but unfortunately the baby doll didn't want to sit still on top of the box of Gogurt and went flying across the floor.  The mom simply stopped, helped buckle baby back in, and off they went.  Sounds really simple, huh?

Side note: when Hayden was 4 or 5 the only way I could get him to tag along to Tar-jay was bribery in the form of popcorn.  He wanted to be in the cart...with his Target popcorn...and do not bother him until it was time to get back in the car...he was busy with the popcorn.  He, of course, was never interested in pushing a baby stroller or the mini shopping carts at the grocery store.

Back home after Target trip: our counselor ***warning: ADD moment here...Do you call it counseling or therapy?  I told Adam that after what we paid for counseling we should call it therapy...it sounds more spa-like or something the Real Housewives would have***

so our counselor told us that part of the process we are going to have to go through right now is grieving the loss of the life we imagined for Battley.  Another tid-bit she mentioned...and was Spot On!...was that we may have trouble sleeping with all the millions of thoughts we would have in the coming weeks.  2-5:30am seems to be my time.

So I'm laying in bed that night and all I can think of is this precious little girl pushing her Gogurt in the stroller.  I think I cried about that for...well, I won't say here...but a while.  I was so sad about the fact that our baby girl may not be able to push a mini shopping cart in the grocery store.

Fast forward to the next sleepless night...I reach for my chapstick.  It smells so good.  I was fascinated by my mother's lipstick when I was little...chapstick is more my style now.  Anyways, I spend the next while grieving the loss of her not being able to love chapstick the way I do.

My best friend gave me a journal after we learned of Battley's diagnosis.  Again, I'm not a writer, but love to make lists...feels so good to check stuff off the list.

The next day I decided it was time to break out that journal and make a list of all the things I wanted Battley to experience that she may never get to do:
push a mini shopping cart in the grocery store
put on chapstick
take a bubble bath
have a favorite baby doll
have a tea party
learn to swim
have a favorite book
make a fort under the dining room table
go for a boat ride
the list goes on for pages...

This was cheap therapy.

Back to today: I've taken my list and prayed for Battley's healing.

He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."  Matthew 17:20

I've heard people say "It's God's will" or "I'll just leave it up to God" when faced with a serious illness or tragedy. Don't fall into that trap. God wants us to pray to him for help. In Luke 18:1 Jesus told his disciples that they "should always pray and not give up." and then Jesus asked "...will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night?" Pray to God from your heart for healing. Don't stop. Don't give up. God wants us to ask him for help. He loves us.

I hope that if anyone who reads this is going through a hard time like we are that you not give up on God.  I hope you don't lie awake at night for a moment without talking to Him.
C

Sunday, December 25, 2011

C and Turkey

So here's the scoop on the name "C and Turkey".

We have one niece and two nephews...real ones.  Then we have a few adopted "nieces" that we adore...our good friends' children.  Maybe this is wrong, but when one of them was really young  we used to ask her to say certain words just to see what they would sound like.  One time we asked her to say "Terhune" and she came up with "Turkey" so Adam is now TURKEY to her. 



We had a quiet Christmas at home this year.  Here are a few photos:

This is our tree.  We had it flocked this year.  A word of caution to anyone considering this...

You will NEED one of these

We don't own one, but after a week of having this thing in the house we borrowed my moms.

We have all our random ornaments on this tree...most of which are ornaments Hayden made.  They are my favorite ones.  Since it's mostly his stuff we call this Hayden's tree.  This year we thought we'd make Battley a tree since Hayden has one.






I started collecting Nutcrackers a few years ago.  My sister-in-law gave me these glasses last year...LOVE THEM!  We had Reindeer Spritzers for breakfast since this is a non-mimosa year for us...well, one of us.



The guys showing off their new tennis bags.  And yes...we opened gifts in our jammies.  That's why there are no pics of me.


I hope everyone had a Merry CHRISTmas. 

C

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Doc Appt

We had an appointment on Monday morning with my doctor. It was fairly uneventful. We discussed having a C-section so that I don't go through labor. Most babies with T18 don't do well with the stress of labor. I have to say that surgery of any kind is scary, but Adam and I are going to pray about what is best to do. We want so badly to hold her so we are willing to do whatever it takes. We go back in 3 weeks for another ultrasound! We will get to see if she's grown any and hopefully can tell more about her heart and esophagus. She was so small last time it was hard to really tell...9 oz.

The past week has been different. I have been praying for hope...it's hard to not lose hope sometimes. In church last week we heard the testimony of a man and wife who were fighting illness and decided they were going to give the illness to God and worship him no matter what the outcome. It was hard to hear...I even had to leave so I didn't boo hoo right then...the "ugly cry" as Oprah would say. I decided that my worry isn't going to help a thing and my God is my God no matter what the outcome is here. I've felt an overwhelming peace since then.

Fast forward back to the doctor's appt on Monday: our doc shared with us that a patient of his wants to talk to us. They had a child with T18 and were able to bring her home! Helloooo HOPE!!

More to come soon on the C and Turkey...apparently some people don't know what that is!

C

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Big Al Mac

We are pug people. Catherine is a list maker. Here is one of her lists...
Pregnant women should NOT make major decisions like:
Deciding to renovate anything
Cutting your hair off
Getting a puppy

So what did she do? She got me a puppy for our anniversary in September! It was one of the only times in my life someone has truly surprised me.

This is Zeke. He's 3.




This is Mac. He's trouble!




Most people think we are Crazy for getting another dog when we are about to have a baby. He has turned out to be such a blessing in a way we never expected. We are always looking for things that make Battley move. Catherine's doctor said we are to treat this pregnancy like any other except that if she doesn't move for a day or two we are to go see him immediately. We noticed after a few days of having Mac that when he makes noise around C's belly, Battley moves all around. Pugs being pugs snort and snore a lot so it's so nice to have him around to snort with Zeke.

We have a regular doctor's appt tomorrow. There are lots of things to chat about...C has a list...so we are praying we get the info we need to make the best decisions for Miss B.

Adam

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Battley Terhune

Thank you to everyone who has reached out to us the past few weeks with your kind words, visits, and most importantly prayers.  They mean more than you can imagine. It's hard to deliver news like this to our friends so someone suggested we start a blog to keep everyone informed.  Here goes...neither of us are writers.

Our baby is a sweet baby GIRL!  Her name is Battley, and we love her SO much.  I've wondered in the past how you can love a second child like the first.  I thought this would be especially hard for me since Hayden and I are so close and it was just the two of us for so long.  My mom used to tell me "it just happens" and it does.  I get that now.

Adam and I learned through sonogram and eventually amniocenteses that our sweet girl has a chromosomal abnormality called Trisomy 18.  You can Google it.  The Wikipedia listing seems to be on target with what our doctors have told us.  In short, her 18th chromosome has 3 chromosomes instead of 2.  This causes multiple problems with babies' hearts, brains, and kidneys.  She is also very tiny because of this.  Realistically the statistics are not in her favor for survival, but we are hopeful for a miracle.  We will accept whatever time God grants us with her.  Every child is a blessing, and we thank God for her everyday.

Adam and I have been to a counselor to deal with the emotions that go along with this.  We will continue to go.  I've stayed away from doing too much online research because I already know what it says, but I did run across an article written about a family who had a son with Trisomy 18.  Some of what the mother had to say was comforting because they were the same thoughts I was having.  Here is a link to the article: http://hamptonroads.com/2008/03/remembering-infants-sixday-life

One of the things she said really stood out to me because it mirrored my exact thoughts the day I read it.  How many times have I had a friend or family member experience a loss and not known what to say...afraid I would say the wrong thing.  I was worried people wouldn't talk to me or be scared of us.  I talk for a living...how was this going to affect my business?  After I read this I promised myself that no matter what people did say to me, I would just be thankful people were talking to me.  Here are her words:
"I know how I've felt on the other end, how paralyzed with the fear of saying or doing the wrong thing," Heidi wrote. "... I'm not expecting perfect words from anyone. Don't be afraid of me, of us, of this. If your heart tells you to do something for us, I promise I won't be upset. I think more than anything I just need people to act, to not wait for me to tell you what to do."

Adam, Hayden, and I covet your prayers for Battley. 

C